"YOU aReNt Always GoNnA hAve a CaLcUIAtOr In Your PoCkEt" -90s teachers
The Chinese village of Zhelaizhai claims to be the descendants of Romans captured at Carrhae. BABE PLEASE YOU ARE A CHINESE THE LOST LEGION IS A MYTH. THE ETERNAL CITY CALLS TO ME
Tyrone tht white girl will never love u more than she loves that dog. It'll never work out. Do u even like Starbucks?
That "one song" in your playlist, which you never delete but always skip. You won't let me live... You won't let me die.
Treatment Resistant DEPRESSION Ketamine CharlestonKetamineCenter.com Words cannot describe the billboard I just saw
The illusion... Chiefs win superbowl Eagles win superbowl ...of free choice. Philadelphia crime rate goes up
>tfw lived long enough to see Ubisoft go fucking bankrupt
"OMG that cop lady slept with 5 coworkers!" Nurses everywhere:
Nigga gave her a health bar I'm crying. I renamed her "❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️" and everytime she makes a mistake I'm removing a heart until it's done for good. Don't got time to lose in 2025
Your King name: All letters of your first name + All letters of your last name
anicent romans watching a guy get mauled by a lion
Your pussy isn't loose they all have small dicks and that sour smell is normal
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"Ok, I wouldn't necessarily have chosen the handle 'AryanAssRaper' and not made those kinds of death threats. But, Margaret, he was 39 when he wrote that. Don't you get to blow off a little steam at 39? Let's give the guy a break."
when you write 10 lines of code without searching on Google. It ain't much, but it's honest work
Germany: Alright, the war's going great, now we only have to worry about Russia and Great Brit- Japan: *Bombs Pearl Harbor* Germany:
are you a CEO? because i'd like to take you out <3 to: from:
thinking about when two non-technical, unemployed kids tried vibe coding for the first time
this girlfriend shit easy af. Look it's me and you. AWWW. US
No one: Fish in grocery stores: We really roasting dead fish now. They do be like that tho
When bro sends you 20 vids so now you're reacting as if you're grading an exam
I feel like this event was born out of a lie that got out of hand..
me 12 redbull vodkas deep and halfway thru an 8ball going up to the milf at the bar to ask if it's her 25th birthday
When you take her sightseeing but you're also trying to drop clues
The girl with a daddy kink when I tell her to hold the fucking flashlight still:
What girls smelled like in the 90s. SUN-RIPENED RASPBERRY Body Splash With Moisturizing Aloe Vera 7.8 FL OZ/230 ml e Bath & Body Works FILTER CIGARETTES Marlboro SMOOTH ORIGINAL FLAVOR
Mediterranean Sea, BUC-EE'S STRIP, Egypt, SINAI, Gaza, Israel, BUC-EE'S
You can't enjoy Kanye's music anymore, haven't you read his tweets?! Me enjoying both his music and his tweets:
thinks he'll get a promotion if the boss notices how hard he is working didn't lie on his resume lunch breaks never go longer than 60 minutes "Chad Time Thief" Doesn't snitch on others when they are goofing off as well makes memes on company time takes time out of his busy schedule to enjoy some funny videos always take the 2 paid breaks he is entitled to spends an hour messing with chair height settings "Virgin Hard Worker" graduated from college and now has to work to repay his debt is greatful to be working listens to podcasts that will help him become a more effective worker tries to hide when he is on youtube even when it is for work hopes to have a career in business administration or data entry tries to be friends with the cute receptionist realizes his job is pointless so does the minimum to not get fired clocks in from hour lunch says he's still on lunch said he has a masters in computer science on his resume, never writen a line of code
my face when seeing someone easily surpass me in the only field I excel:
I'm no longer supporting SpaceX and will change my support to NASA. I refuse to support any organization that hires Nazis. NASA:
this store still has happy birthday stuff out even though my birthday was back in july
Women: Babe I love you not the money Men: OK and sign this prenup Women:
What figure has 2 triangular faces and 3 rectangular faces? nigga you ain't teach this
No. Don't be a "women should cook for me" misogynist. Be a "cooking is too important to be entrusted to women" misogynist. (It's Nietzschean.)
Me fighting off thirsty girls in my DM after they witness my majestic meme wizardry
Jesus watching me raw dog a married woman in the parking lot of a Chuck E Cheese while our kids play the games inside. Oh hell yeah these are the sins I died for
GET IN LOSER WE'RE RETAKING CONSTANTINOPLE
Coworker: hey, want to see pictures of my kids from the Memorial Day weekend? Me: sure, just a sec..
How every far left liberal girl looks after getting the absolute worst haircut imaginable.
WORKOUT SCHEDULE MON TUE WED THU FRI SAT SUN CHASE WOMEN AT NIGHT X 2 HOURS CHASE WOMEN AT NIGHT X 2 HOURS CHASE WOMEN AT NIGHT BREAK DAY CHASE WOMEN AT NIGHT X 2 HOURS CHASE WOMEN AT NIGHT X 2 HOURS CHASE WOMEN AT NIGHT X 2 HOURS HIDE IN PLAIN SIGHT. LEARN THEIR RUNNING ROUTES.
Average developer : var atpos=inputs[i].indexOf( var dotpos=inputs[i].lastIndexOf(" if (atpos<1 || dotpos
If there's no oxygen in space then how the sun is still burning?
Girls be talking up a big game in txts but once you get them in bed they be like ANIMORPHS Everything changes. But not quite like this, Watch ANIMORPHS on TV The Separation K. A. Applegate
Chicago man arrested after repeatedly stealing guns off of officers using a toy dino grabber.
The guy who picked on me in high school and then became a millionaire just came into McDonald's and I shorted him on his fries. Checkmate Justin, you fucking loser.
TV came with a whole living room set 💯
when you just blew half a planet in her mouth and she tries to kiss you
Kanye fans that like his music. Kanye fans that just like his racism
AURORA AUSTRALIS?! IN THE BLEEDIN' DAYTIME IN BLOODY SUMMER IN THIS PART OF THE OUTBACK CONTAINED IN YOUR DUNNY? YEAH MATE GIVE US A SQUIZ? YEAH NAH
When you are an American father and ask your son what comes before 15, and he answers 14 instead of "AR" *Sad bald eagle noises*
So you're a Scorpio and I'm a Libra so we match perfectly together. Wtf this b*tch talking bout. Omg no way I guess we're meant to be
Driving to work every day at 5am because I wanted to be funny in high school. (CRYING)
me: let's rewrite the CSS my website:
The 32 year old VOOTER. "What?! You aren't going to VOOT?! It is your civic dooty!!" Thinks his voot makes a difference and actually changes anything. vooted for over 14 years already, nothing changed. "OOOHHHH YEAH, I'M VOOOOTIN!!!!" Thinks vooting is the solution to the world's problems when it hasn't even solved anything in his own country. "Give me the ability to voot and I'll never revolt." Housing? basic necessities? nah just need voooooting. Still foolishly thinks "the people have the power!" like a child. Has no goals, thoughts or ideas beyond what the media or US government alphabet agencies spoon-feeds him.
Woman Texting Group Chat About Crush Double-Checks That 'Atlantic' Editor Not in Here
When a fat chick tries to impress you by sucking you off after you bust. That'll do pig
A freaky 7 is hotter than a 10 who only does missionary CHANGE MY MIND
Supposedly the moon landing is not a hoax. Can you present facts on why it's real? Not just "because le government said it happened, so it must be real". You can look through a telescope and see tracks the moon rovers made. NASA hand-drew those on every telescope.
They say goths are the scary ones but women who dress like this scare me 100000x more
Straight guys All of you, get out! LGBTQ Porn Except you, you stay. Lesbian Porn
wikiHow How to negotiate a higher salary Co-authored by Trudi Griffin, LPC Updated: June 3, 2019 MEME ZAR
- And you know what they call a Quarter Pounder with Cheese in Paris? - مدقة الربع مع الجبن
Me: there's no way we live in a simulation. Person: have you ever seen your neighbor bringing in groceries? Me:
Never ask a White Supremacist The race of his girlfriend
When she looks up at you while giving you some of that “I'm sorry I made you mad” head, but you ain't over it yet
Imagine if instead of killing each other slavs worked together. We could steal every car in Germany in three days.
When you realize you can freely drive around with swastikas on your Tesla and people will just assume it got vandalized.
when people are discussing world events but you ain't seen a meme about it yet. What the fuck are these people talking about?
Mom: iF aLL yOuR frEiNds jUMpeD oFF a cLiFF wOUld yoU?! 10 y/o me Current me
Don't settle for some ordinary mid Woman, G! Get a 6 pack, a penthouse and a Lamborghini so you can attract women who will immediately leave you if you ever lost any of those things
Preparing my urban ghillie suit in case I get stuck in San Francisco
When you've been playing an online game with a random person for three hours, and they finally have to leave: It's been an honor. Good luck.
Canada begins construction on a wall at the Canada US border
THIS IS Control Panel BITCH!!! we clown in this muthafucka betta take yo sensitive ass back to
I kill everything I fuck, I fuck everything I kill
How I Made $290,000 Selling Books
We never discuss the emotional labor of guys holding back great jokes and comebacks to not make their girl cry
EVERY TIME I HEAR PAM BONDI SAY SOMETHING Impressive, very nice. Now let's see the Epstein Files.
How you look when saying that January 6 was an insurrection
When you pirate a game and run it but you see cmd opening for a split second and closing immediately after
give me all of your bee syrup now. please dont take it from me my wife is pregnant. Fuck sorry. Wronge person. Plz ignore. Im normal i promise
Eric, CEO of the Swiss... This is what car manufacturers have taken from you
Guy: Hey I'd like to have some chili Waitress: I'm sorry sir but this is a Japanese Restaurant Guy: *stretches his eyes* Herro, I'd rike to have some chiri
Every woman in New York, if Instagram existed during 9/11
>sees a guy perform straight up sorcery >betrays him Was Judas retarded? Even on the off chance he WASNT the son of God you're still messing with some high level wizard
you jerk off to pornography. i jerk off to abstract ideas like success and Fat bitches fighting over food we are not the same.
America owns Gaza, Dylan Mulvaney in a Bud Light ad
I DEMAND BETTER PAY THAN JOHN! EQUALITY FOR WOMEN NOW! YOU'RE NOT QUALIFIED NOR YOU BEEN WITH ME COMPANY AS LONG EARN THE SAME... STOP LOOKING AT MY BOOBS YOU SEXIST PIG! WAIT, WHAAA? YOU'RE PAYING, RIGHT? OR WHAT? ARE YOU NOT A MAN?
Authoritarian, Left, Right, Libertarian, bye men, by men, bi men, buy men
The Two-party System pulling the lever changes the color of the trolley from red to blue
When you find a good meme and send it to your two friends
When she finds out you have a meme page
This and a girl with a bush
REPUBLICANS WILL BE EXPOSED BY THIS TOO! GOOD.
Me going to tell my family that they don't have to live in this old and small house anymore (I lost it in gambling)
Me at my own funeral sharing one more meme before I go to hell